Friday 24th November 2017
By Michelle Hammond
The freedom to fail is vital if you’re going to succeed. Most successful people fail from time to time, and it is a measure of their strength that failure merely propels them into some new attempt at success.
Now i know for most the thought of ‘failing’ fills them with absolute dread and sends them in to what can only be described as “blind panic”. Forcing many to frequently take the road of least resistance through their lives in an attempt to somehow ‘guarantee’ against any associated ‘failure’.
So why is it that even though the evidence is so compelling and we’re shown time and time again – that to truly succeed, one must fail. The thought alone is so debilitating to most people!
Of course when you look back at how most of us were educated – there were often no lessons on the intrinsic failure / success link. You were either going to make it or you weren’t. You either passed or you failed. You either won or you lost. So it’s understandable then isn’t it, that many of us find it hard to now separate the fiction from the fact. When you’ve been taught the ‘either / or’ approach to success and failure. It’s easy to see why most remain paralysed – suspended in the fear of making a mistake.
Yet if you spin your mind back to the time when you were a baby, you can see the success / failure link – entwined so beautifully in to everything you did. It doesn’t matter how bright or how forward a child you were – nobody walking the earth today ever just ‘did’. We all had to learn to ‘walk’ and ‘talk’ – first by ‘failing’ – often many hundreds of times! The importance was not wrapped around the fact that you kept ‘failing’ – it was focused on your resilience. Your unwavered determination to ‘just keep trying’. As a baby you did not see failure as one thing and success as another. You saw everything you did as a ‘step’ – as a possible way forward – to a deeper understanding. An understanding that enabled and empowered you to try again, or to make a change and try again.
The fact is – failure and success are intrinsically linked and you would be hard pressed to find examples in any walk of life where any type of ‘success is truly found in isolation of some experience of ‘failure’. So what you truly need to learn and teach is that it’s ok to fail – if you tried your best, or if you didn’t, if the competition was greater, or more prepared – then accept it for being what it was – what it is and move forward. We know there is no place for regrets. So ‘failing’ is ok. Actually it is most often critical – what however, would not be ok – is to keep failing at the same thing and not learning from it, not making a change or worst still blaming anyone and everyone else for your failure and not taking ownership and responsibility for the decisions you make and the actions you take.
As Einstein said: ’Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result”.
You have to learn from your actions and actions that result in failure (as we may perceive it) are just lesson to be learnt in order to allow us and help us move forward: Toward success – whatever ‘success’ means to you.
So don’t allow the fear of failure to stop you in your tracks. Don’t allow it stop you from reaching youR full potential. Rejoice in the wisdom that you will fail – it is the only way you can truly succeed. Step forward and take action and reach for your dreams. They are all within your grasp!
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